Gorblins (not to be confused with the mythological creature of a similar name), are blue small humanoid creatures with foul intent. And while they are typically found in homes, it is unknown to pinpoint an exact location. As Gorblins are known to have cropped up in warehouses, toolsheds and kitchens where specifically mac n cheese was made on the day prior to their reported arrival.
artist depiction of a Gorblin
A Gorblin takes the form of a small humanoid creature with a giant round head with no neck. They run at concerning speeds to avoid danger and bad smells.
This isn't something to be ashamed of however. The arrival of a Gorblin is unexpected and completely out of your control. It doesn't have to be this way though as I have made this comprehensive page to help you not only deal with, but to avoid a Gorblin invasion (not an infestation, this is far too serious)
I have no idea why, but the bastards love that stuff. Like yeah I enjoy it as much as the next guy, but he just eats that shit every single day. He doesn't even drink or anything like regular creatures do, he just eats mac n cheese and then runs off into a hole somewhere. Freaks me out to be honest.
If you ask me, this is a clear sign that mac n cheese are a no go. Tough decision I know, but it's a sacrifice I'm willing to make if it means getting this little shit out of my house. As such, make sure that any and all mac n cheese products are not cooked or kept in your home. If this is too much of a burden to handle, that is understandable. The last resort should be that you consume mac n cheese within your home in secret or eat it outside your home. But be careful, the scent of it on your clothing may attract Gorblins.
Gorblins hate Goblins because they are green and they are not. Goblins piss them off so much that they will attempt to avoid and all contact with them. As such, make sure to include goblin like activities into your life. Discuss Goblin related things with relatives, have a room painted green, apply goblin decor into your home and for added measure, dress up like a goblin. This is known to work nearly 50% of the time. If it does not, you have angered the Gorblin. Your home is no longer safe.
It should go without saying, I am talking about LEGALLY HIRED gorblinists. I will NOT nor will I EVER provide illegal sources to a local Gorblinist. But if all else fails, there is really no other options on the table for you. A gorblinist from what I heard can help with dealing with them. Be warned however that some Gorblinists are sick in the head and may be as much of a threat as the Gorblins. DO NOT ask them about their Gorblin Mallet.
I will not be providing any links or sources to a gorblinist. This is something you must find and obtain on your own accord.
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